Farmyard Friday #9: Faster than a speeding cat?

Of all the animals featured so far on Farmyard Fridays, cats are probably the most divisive. People tend to either really love cats or hate them. The haters have many reasons, often allergies, or cats aloofness, or their perceived 'evil' status. The latter can be laid at the door of Pope Innocent VIII, who is certainly not innocent of libelling felines; during the Spanish Inquisition he condemned cats as being evil and had them burned. This all backfired though as this led to a rise in the rat population which led to the Black Death: Cats 1 Humans 0.

I like cats, and whilst they're not wholly associated with farmyards as pigs and sheep are, they are an essential part of farm life. It's also coming up to four years since I said goodbye to my lovely cat, so forgive me for indulging myself.

There are hundreds of facts about cats as they are a fascinating and strange species. Perhaps this is another reason why so many people dislike them, as they can be so bizarre and alien. They've made far fewer concessions to humans than dogs have in the process of domestication meaning that you can end up sharing your home with a complete stranger. Dogs live underneath humans' feet, only being allowed out when dictated by their owners and being accompanied on their walks. Cats take themselves off as and when they please and live a very secretive life, only returning when they want an ear rub or some woefully expensive food (did you know you can now get pate for cats? Like, what?) Basically, cats have made us their slaves: Cats 2 Humans 0.

Cats however can boast of defeating us in yet another way apart from being hideously independent and infinitely better rat catchers than us. Everybody knows cheetahs are the fastest land mammal (although only over short distances) and in comparison to them, the humble domestic moggy's 30mph top speed seems pretty pathetic. But let's not compare the cat to the cheetah; let's compare them to other things. Cats can run at the speed limit for built up areas. They can run as fast as a kangaroo can hop and a bear can run. In a race with an elephant, black mamba or squirrel, a cat would win (probably just as well in the case of the black mamba). In fairness to the cat, even a whippet only runs 5mph faster than a cat.

But here comes the biggie, the one which shows that cats are pretty much superior to humans: cats run 3mph faster than Usain Bolt.

Cats 3 Humans 0

Farmyard Friday Fact #9: The domestic cat can run at a top speed of 30mph - faster than Usain Bolt.

Admittedly, most of the time, they're doing stuff like this. Cats 1 Dogs 0.